tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18414020709537837242024-02-20T13:35:44.992-05:00On The Needles-- My Work-In-Progress LifeMarciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.comBlogger224125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-49165383122751243182015-06-13T11:45:00.001-04:002015-06-13T11:45:03.627-04:00suyb - may and juneSo it turns out I was too lazy to write this post last month, so this month you get twice the fun! (P.S.- I know I'm 4 days late this month too. Get off my ass.)<br />
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<a href="http://www.lifeaccordingtosteph.com/" title="Life According to Steph"><img alt="Life According to Steph" src="http://i1290.photobucket.com/albums/b536/lifeaccordingtosteph1/bookbuttonlinkup_zps01365b43.jpg" style="border: none;" /></a></div>
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<a name='more'></a>I sometimes go on these kicks where I read a ton of books by the same author and/or are in the same series. I did that this/last month. I love Robin Cook-- nerdy medical mysteries make my heart happy-- and so I went on a binge of his Jack Stapleton series. I didn't read them all, and I sure didn't read them in order, but I did read 5: <i style="font-weight: bold;">Intervention, Cure, Foreign Body, Blindsight, Chromosome 6, </i>and<b> <i>Critical.</i></b> I love them all and recommend anything written by Robin Cook, although I will admit this is one series where you're left wondering how the protagonist ALWAYS gets out of these impossible (and impossibly dangerous) situations. If you're good at suspension of disbelief, though, they're quite enjoyable.<br />
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Before/after/during all that, I actually read some other books by some other authors! Here are my thoughts on those:<br />
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<i>In One Person</i> - So sorry to all of you SUYB-ers who recommended this book, but I found it to be a little bit of a slog. I can't exactly put my finger on why. I liked the story, and, being John Irving, it was obviously well-written. But once I hit about halfway through, I kept checking the TOC and wondering, "Is it done yet?"<br />
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<i>After Birth</i> - You know those books that you put on your to-read list or your library hold list and then, by the time you've gotten around to them, you forget what they're about or why you wanted to read them in the first place? This book was like that for me. When I first started reading it, I thought I had put it on my list as a non-fiction, birth-y book. This obviously is not that (judging by "A novel" on the cover). I think maybe if I had gone into it with different expectations, I wouldn't have been so disappointed. As it was, I spent most of the book confused and wondering "What is this book, and why did I want to read it?"<br />
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<i>Food: A Love Story</i> - This book is laugh-out-loud funny. And, of course, anyone who writes an ode to food is tops in my book. I read the book, but I can see this being a fantastic audiobook. One of my favorites for the month; in fact, I'll be reading his other book, <i>Dad is Fat</i>, next month.<br />
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<i>Popular</i> - I really liked this book. I wonder what it would be like to read it as an angsty teenager, one the age of Maya. If you would really get the book's lessons or brush it off like everything that grown-ups tell you. Reading it as an adult, you find yourself nodding your head a lot and remembering when middle school and all of its trials and tribulations were your whole world. I thought a lot about how brave this girl was while reading it. I never would have had the intestinal fortitude. As a humorous side note, my middle school cafeteria was also striated by popularity level (and a VERY strict hierarchy it was)... is that how all middle schools work?<br />
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<i>Zero to Five</i> - Look at me! I finally read a baby/parenting book! I really liked this book, and am pretty sure I'll be shelling out the cash at some point to buy it. It's like <i>Freakonomics</i> for parenting infants and toddlers, with a healthy dose of personal anecdotes.<br />
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<i>Some Girls</i> - This book is about a girl who goes to work in a harem in Brunei (non-fiction). I felt the book was well-written, but I definitely couldn't identify with the author. Not in a judgmental way, just like I could never imagine making any of those choices for myself. I think that's what kept me from really getting into it like I do with some books.<br />
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<i>The Martian</i> - Go straight to this book. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200. I devoured this book in 5 hours. Still on the fence about whether or not I'm going to see the movie, but I could read this book again and again.<br />
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<i>Do No Harm</i> - This book was good. Each chapter was a little vignette about his time as a neurosurgeon, and I found it interesting to read (even if tangentially) about the health care system in the UK. It wasn't my favorite book ever, but it definitely kept my attention.<br />
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<i>Inside the O'Briens</i> - To paraphrase Barney Stinson, I give this book the ugliest of cries. Uglier than TFIOS, which is really saying something. It's a (fictional, thank FSM) story about a family whose world is rocked by the father's Huntington's Disease diagnosis. All the feels. Highly recommend it.<br />
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tl;dr synopsis? Read <i>Food: A Love Story, The Martian, </i>and <i>Inside the O'Briens</i>. You won't be disappointed!</div>
Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-51797041271071748182015-05-27T07:41:00.000-04:002015-05-27T07:41:28.294-04:00loan progress -- 05.27.15<b><span style="color: red;">Undergrad: $0<br />Law School: $12,870.74</span></b><br />
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The light at the end of the tunnel is getting SO BRIGHT! I paid off another loan last Friday which leaves me 2 to go. Part of me is like "about damn time!" and part of me is like "omg I can't believe the end is here already!" With my current trajectory, I'll have the second-to-last one paid off a week or two before the baby arrives, leaving a grand total of about $5500 to go. I'll be able to get rid of that before the end of the year, no problem. How excited am I?!<br />
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I'm still stunned to realize that by the end of June I'll be in the 4-digit territory. When I started out at ~$72,000, it seemed so unattainable. Yet there's something about an elephant that comes to mind...<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Poster available for purchase <a href="https://www.etsy.com/listing/192312819/how-to-eat-an-elephant-animal-proverb?ref=shop_home_feat_1" target="_blank">here</a></td></tr>
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<br />Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-23811163398951683912015-05-06T10:40:00.000-04:002015-05-06T10:40:03.779-04:00the definition of needRemember when you were a kid and you would beseech your parents for something? "But mooooooom!!!!! I <u>neeeeeeeeed</u> it!!!!" and your mother would answer, "You don't <u>NEED</u> it. You just want it." Well, pregnancy brings with it a whole new definition of the word. I never fully understood it until I got pregnant myself, but it's true.<br />
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My first craving was for Pizza Hut's stuffed crust pizza (oh how I wish this post were sponsored). I saw a commercial for it during March Madness, and then it was all I could think about. I ordered it one day as I was leaving work. First of all, the new crust options? Paralyzed by choice. I finally went for the "Hut Favorite." Then came choosing the topping(s). Don't they know all I want is the freaking crust? I don't care what toppings are on this pizza! GIVE ME THE CRUST!!! But really, it was just as delicious as I thought it could be. I kept ordering it. More, <u>more</u>, MORE! Until one night, when tragedy struck.<br />
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Well, I suppose since I didn't know about it until the next morning, that's probably when the tragedy struck. I was making my breakfast, and when I went to throw something away, I saw it. A whole piece of stuffed crust laying on top of the garbage like it was, well, garbage. I. Was. Furious. I stomped out to the living room and gave C the what for. Then I walked back and picked it out of the garbage.<br />
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I stood there for a couple moments, weighing my options. The pull to eat this piece of crust that had been sitting in the garbage for 12 hours was disturbingly strong. I tried to rationalize by telling myself that there was nothing dirty in the garbage at the time (true), so it would be fine. I really did come <u>thisclose</u> to eating it. In the end, concern for the parasite won out, and I threw it back in the trash. Not gonna lie, I almost cried after I did that.<br />
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I've since moved on to Eggo waffles. The day that that started, I ate 8 waffles for dinner. And that's it. I also put hamburger and cheese on top of them. Damn was that good.<br />
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C sat across from me at the table (while eating a perfectly normal meal of chili) and said, "You're right, Marcie. You really haven't been having any cravings." #sideeye<br />
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<br />Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-39461819193903524512015-04-27T09:23:00.000-04:002015-04-27T09:23:06.105-04:00feels like longerYesterday C and I went out to dinner to celebrate our third wedding anniversary (mmmm... The Melting Pot). I think we're both feeling a little extra reflective since this will be our last anniversary as a family of two (plus Grover), and it was a really nice dinner. Lots of talking and laughing and absolutely no drinking (sigh). <br />
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A photo posted by Marcie (@marcie_pants) on <time datetime="2015-04-26T21:15:38+00:00" style="font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px;">Apr 26, 2015 at 2:15pm PDT</time></div>
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<script async="" defer="" src="//platform.instagram.com/en_US/embeds.js"></script>As we were going to bed last night, I had an epiphany. I told C that I had finally figured out what people meant when they said "feels like longer" when you ask them how long they've been married. I always thought it was such a disparaging thing (C's response-- "Yeah, it's not sounding too good right now, so get to your point." :) ), but I get it now.<br />
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C and I have been married for 3 whole years now, and that's not really that long. I can't really <u>remember</u> what life was like before him. Oh sure, I clearly remember things from before we were together, but those memories are almost like stories... "in a previous life," as some would describe it. So yeah, when I say "three years" out loud, that doesn't seem like that long... feels like longer though.Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-24811349841142082822015-04-21T12:32:00.000-04:002015-04-21T12:32:05.828-04:00speculating is funMy anatomy ultrasound is scheduled for May 7, which means that afternoon C and I will find out if Baby B is a boy or a girl!<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><i><a href="http://cwtampa.cbslocal.com/2015/02/06/royal-baby-2-boy-or-girl/" target="_blank">source</a></i></td></tr>
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In anticipation, I scoured the internet looking for all those hilarious old wives' tales about gender prediction. Some of them I've never even heard before, and I think, "Who comes up with this crap?!" Anyway, here's how Baby B shakes out--<br />
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<b>Sleep position:</b> left side = boy/ right side = girl ----- ugh, is neither an option?! Side sleeping has thus far been the bane of my existence. If I had to pick though, I'd go with right side. <b><span style="color: #ea9999;">GIRL</span></b><br />
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<b>Morning sickness:</b> little = boy/ lots = girl ----- obviously, I had all the <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2015/02/life-lately.html" target="_blank">sick</a>. In fact, this baby still seems to be fundamentally opposed to clean teeth. <b><span style="color: #ea9999;">GIRL</span></b><br />
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<b>Hands: </b>dry = boy/ soft = girl ----- I find my hands to be... regular? I don't know?! I don't ever use lotion, so soft, I guess? <b><span style="color: #ea9999;">GIRL</span></b><br />
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<b>Cravings: </b>salty = boy/ sweet = girl ----- I've always been a salty person, and this pregnancy is no exception. <span style="color: #3d85c6;"><b>BOY</b></span><br />
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<b>Steal your beauty:</b> no = boy/ yes = girl ----- I'm not sure how one finds this out. Does someone come up to you and say "Oh, you must be having a girl because you look like a tired old hag?" Because that's a recipe for getting bitch-slapped by this momma. No one has told me that I look uglier than usual, so that must mean the boy column gets a win here. <b style="color: #3d85c6;">BOY</b><br />
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<b>Gracefulness:</b> no = boy/ yes = girl ----- I haven't noticed myself being overly clumsy, so...? <b><span style="color: #ea9999;">GIRL</span></b><br />
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<b>Fat face:</b> no = boy/ yes = girl ----- Again, you tell me my face is getting fat, your face is about to get fatter from the punch I'mma hit it with. That said, I don't think I look a whole lot different. <b style="color: #3d85c6;">BOY</b><br />
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<b>Mood swings:</b> no = boy/ yes = girl ----- My fuse is definitely a bit (ok, a lot) shorter, but my moods aren't really swinging. <b style="color: #3d85c6;">BOY</b><br />
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<b>Baby bump:</b> low = boy/ high = girl ----- I find this the most humorous of all of them, considering that the baby is at the bottom, no matter what gender it is. If you have a lot of stuff up top, those are your innards, not so much the baby. Whatever. :) I guess I would have to say low, since my high-waisted pre-pregnancy pants still fit but the low-rise ones don't. <b style="color: #3d85c6;">BOY</b><br />
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<b>Baby weight:</b> front = boy/ all around = girl ----- Umm, I carried my weight all around before I ever got pregnant. Oh look, that means I'M a girl! Wait, is that not how that works? <b><span style="color: #ea9999;">GIRL</span></b><br />
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<b>Wedding ring swing:</b> line = boy/ circle = girl ----- The funny thing is that some of them say to put it over your palm, and others say to put it over your belly. The ring makes a line over my palm and a circle over my belly. Most of the websites say to put it over your belly, so I think the girls have it. <b><span style="color: #ea9999;">GIRL</span></b><br />
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<b>Numerology:</b> even + odd = boy/ same = girl ----- This is a new one for me. If your age and year of conception are both even or odd, it's girl. One even, one odd means a boy. Well, I'm 29 and this baby was conceived in 2015, so apparently it's a girl. <b><span style="color: #ea9999;">GIRL</span></b><br />
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<b>Heartbeat:</b> <150bpm = boy/ >150bpm = girl ----- at my last appointment, Baby B's heartbeat was right about 150 (once he or she stopped hiding from the Doppler. little shit.) At the appointment before, it was 162. At the first appointment, it was 183. Sounds like perhaps this one is full of shit? Oh wait, they're ALL full of shit! Ha! If we keep going with this trend, the baby's heartbeat is likely below 150 at this point. <b style="color: #3d85c6;">BOY</b><br />
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And I've saved the best for last-----<br />
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<b>Chinese Gender Chart:</b> based on my age at conception (29) and the month of conception (January), it's a <b><span style="color: #ea9999;">GIRL</span></b><br />
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For those of you keeping score at home, that's 8 in the <b><span style="color: #ea9999;">GIRL</span></b> column and 6 in the <b style="color: #3d85c6;">BOY</b> column. I've felt all along that this baby is a boy, although strangely enough as soon as I started feeling him/her moving, I have the overwhelming urge to refer to it as "her" and "she." C has always been convinced that it's a girl. We'll see in a couple of weeks! :) Feel free to leave your predictions in the comments-- other people's reasoning always makes me smile.Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-54237561614239705182015-04-14T09:43:00.002-04:002015-04-14T09:43:59.895-04:00week 16 bumpdateIt's a good thing this isn't a paying gig, because I would have been fired long ago!<br />
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Things are going pretty well over here for me and Baby B. We've officially reached week 16 (baby's the size of a <a href="http://www.pregnantchicken.com/pregnant/week-16" target="_blank">hand grenade</a>), and the anatomy ultrasound has been scheduled for May 7! I've finally stopped puking, I can eat again, and in the MOST exciting news, I can feel the baby moving!! It took me a couple of days to believe it, since I wasn't expecting to feel anything for like another month, but there's no denying it. It'll still probably be at least a couple more weeks before C will be able to feel anything from the outside, so for now these little movements are all mine ;)<br />
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I still go back and forth on whether I think that I'm "showing." I started out with quite the layer of belly fat to begin with, so things don't really look much different to me. C says that he can tell though. I think part of it is that I can no longer really suck it in anymore, so I <u>appear</u> bigger. My high-waisted pants still fit, but anything with a lower rise cannot be buttoned. I'm also rapidly running out of shirts, as they seem to be shrinking. I'm still below my pre-pregnancy weight (thanks puking), but I can tell that my midsection is... rearranging itself.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCuZCJ-2XuCOnXt944JG3VTUAOt_KeUFStb8FyMqcoJRVzUIDWdLc4TgLum59HlGh5UbbqRROepoG-xmzR2VLoCHmOuG6dN6zCzwcCSQxei-h3D7L6ZOVS1K-nZjBxYIiol4urriKC0rcL/s1600/232323232-fp83232-uqcshlukaxroqdfv39;56-nu=32;7-6-2-777-WSNRCG=3;4269-284337nu0mrj.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCuZCJ-2XuCOnXt944JG3VTUAOt_KeUFStb8FyMqcoJRVzUIDWdLc4TgLum59HlGh5UbbqRROepoG-xmzR2VLoCHmOuG6dN6zCzwcCSQxei-h3D7L6ZOVS1K-nZjBxYIiol4urriKC0rcL/s1600/232323232-fp83232-uqcshlukaxroqdfv39;56-nu=32;7-6-2-777-WSNRCG=3;4269-284337nu0mrj.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Week 14-- there ain't no baby in there. that's just fat.</td></tr>
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It also occurred to me that I never shared Baby B's first picture with you! Well here you are-- this was 7 weeks ago (back when baby was the size of an olive).<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj69kd9bZcqAPEd_rvQGc7_HDcHTWkBs8h2cn6bWwbb6A64vWkfTtN4QIM3Q-VuSHBVzUP2QmBju3RBlwQ8QMaaw0yDFy-jO21o6j6SUUYzdnr-TRxuCKseTLB7hAFO2nTNCtLCAcXW06Np/s1600/232323232-fp83232-uqcshlukaxroqdfv34-42-nu=32;7-6-2-777-WSNRCG=3;38429584337nu0mrj.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj69kd9bZcqAPEd_rvQGc7_HDcHTWkBs8h2cn6bWwbb6A64vWkfTtN4QIM3Q-VuSHBVzUP2QmBju3RBlwQ8QMaaw0yDFy-jO21o6j6SUUYzdnr-TRxuCKseTLB7hAFO2nTNCtLCAcXW06Np/s1600/232323232-fp83232-uqcshlukaxroqdfv34-42-nu=32;7-6-2-777-WSNRCG=3;38429584337nu0mrj.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Such a photogenic olive <3</td></tr>
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In other exciting news, I'll be paying off yet another student loan next month! That will leave me with just 2 to go. I should pay off the next one in September (the two remaining loans are the largest ones) before Baby gets here. That leaves one left, which should be gone in December. AND THAT'S IT! It's hard to believe that the end is so near... I've been working on it for so long! C and I are about to undertake some major life changes though (above and beyond Baby B's arrival--more to come on that), so that last one may not get paid off right on time. That's ok, it'll still be a huge victory when it gets done.Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-73557957839842783002015-04-14T08:33:00.002-04:002015-04-14T08:35:36.243-04:00SUYB - AprilSo I only read a few books this month... I always feel inadequate next to all the other SUYB participants. Oh well... onward!<br />
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<a href="http://www.lifeaccordingtosteph.com/" title="Life According to Steph"><img src="http://i1290.photobucket.com/albums/b536/lifeaccordingtosteph1/bookbuttonlinkup_zps01365b43.jpg" alt="Life According to Steph" style="border:none;" /></a></div>
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<i>Shakespeare Saved My Life</i> - This was part of the library's "big read" program, which meant that like everyone in the world could check out the ebook at the same time. It was interesting to me because it took place in a prison that is just a few miles up the road from where I grew up, and I'm a sucker for things that take place in familiar locales (hello, TFIOS). It was a little bit political (as books about prisons are wont to do), but not too bad. I mostly found it interesting that these prisoners were so obsessed with Shakespeare, considering I hate Shakespeare and find it incredibly dull and hard to read.<br />
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<i>State of Wonder</i> - I freaking loved this book. I don't remember where I heard about it, but I'm so glad I did. By the time it was available from the library, I had even forgotten the synopsis and why I wanted to read it, but I forged onward :) I think the only bad thing I have to say about this book is that the chapters are really long (because I'm one of those people who's incapable of putting down a book in the middle of a chapter), but the rest of it was great. The writing was great, the plot was great, and the ending was totally unexpected. Although I <u>am</u> still left with some questions about the characters, I think that's the hallmark of a good book-- I got invested enough in the characters to wonder what comes next.<br />
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<i>The Mask</i> - I was looking for something available to read (library struggles), and this came up. I've read a couple Dean Koontz books before, so I figured I'd go for it. This book is disturbing and trippy. If you believe in reincarnation and/or enjoy hearing about people getting hacked up with axes, this book is for you. If not, I cannot in good conscience recommend it.<br />
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And that's all! I should probably start reading some baby/pregnancy books at some point, but what fun is that? ;) I can't wait to see what everyone else read this month, so I can add to my library hold pile!<br />
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Has anyone else read <i>State of Wonder</i>? Did you love it as much as I did??Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-15432662339085807272015-03-15T18:28:00.004-04:002015-03-16T08:28:13.340-04:002015 Q1 book challenge -- the resultsI absolutely loved participating in this book challenge! It's just what I needed to start reading again... man have I missed it. (You can read my original post <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2014/12/books-books.html" target="_blank">here</a>.)<br />
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<a name='more'></a>Some (most? all?) of the books changed from my beginning post-- nobody puts baby in a corner. Here's how I did:<br />
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<b>5 points: Read a book, any book that is at least 200 pages long. - </b><i>Of Scars and Stardust by Andrea Hannah. </i>336 pages. This book was on <a href="http://thewifeintraining.com/life-adventures/lets-talk-about-reading/" target="_blank">Lindsay's</a> to-read list, and I got intrigued. This book is FUCKED. UP. I didn't fully appreciate just how fucked up it is until the end, although I suppose that's the hallmark of a good book-- you can't see the end coming from a mile away. I would recommend, although it's not a book I can imagine myself reading again. 4 stars<br />
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<b>10 points: Read a book that begins with the “A”, “An”, or “The”. -</b> <i>The First True Lie by Marina Mander. </i>This book was sad. So sad. Like, I may have had to stop reading it a few times and then come back to it sad. It was a good book though. It was a little hard to follow because it's told by the young boy (and let's be real, young boys are not known for their linear thought processes), but it all comes together. Not my favorite, but good... except for the ending. The ending was terrible. 3 stars.<br />
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<b>10 points: Read a book with a two word title. -</b> <i>On Immunity by Eula Biss. </i>This was a good book. The chapters were kind of strange... seemed like a bunch of vignettes whose connections were only evident about midway through each chapter. It was really good though. 4 stars.<br />
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<b>15 points: Read a book with an animal in the title. -</b> <i>What the Dog Saw by Malcolm Gladwell. </i>Yeah, I had every intention of reading <i>Eating Animals</i>, but <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2015/02/life-lately.html" target="_blank">I don't think I can stomach it</a> right now. This book actually had far more references to food than I was anticipating, but I managed to power through :) It was a lot of nerdy fun. 4 stars.<br />
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<b>20 points: Take the first letter of your first name…Read a book that the title begins with that letter. -</b> <i>Man Alive by Thomas Page McBee. </i>I'm not really sure what I was expecting, but I can tell you that this wasn't it. The story is about a transgender man and his decision to transition and its effects on those around him, which is all well and good, it's just... I don't know. I can't really put my finger on it. I think maybe it was just too short (not even 200 pages!) and so it didn't feel fleshed out enough? There's also sort of a sub-plot (I won't give it away), and so then it REALLY didn't feel fleshed out. I don't know. 2 stars.<br />
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<b>20 points: Read a book set in any country in Europe. -</b> <i>The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared by Jonas Jonasson. </i>I freaking loved this book. It was hilarious. If I could recommend only one of the books on this list, this one would be it. 5 stars.<br />
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<b>25 points: Read a book from the NPR’s guide of great books from 2014. -</b> <i>Everything I never Told You by Celeste Ng. </i>This book was equal parts relatable and haunting. I think everyone has pieces of themselves that they've put on the back burner for the sake of some greater good, and the characters in this story take that to disastrous ends. 4 stars.<br />
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<b>30 points: Read a book by a favourite author that is not a re-read. -</b> <i>All Fall Down by Jennifer Weiner. </i>Oh I love Jennifer Weiner, and this book did not disappoint. As heavy as chick lit gets (mom becomes addicted to painkillers and ends up in rehab), it was still an easy read. I finished it in a day. 4.5 stars.<br />
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<b>30 points: Read a book by a comedian or comedic actor. - </b><i>Bossypants by Tina Fey. </i>Love me some Tina Fey. A light afternoon read; laughed out loud at multiple points. I was glad I didn't buy it though. 3 stars.<br />
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<b>35 points: Read a book about science, discovery, or a scientific process – non-fiction only. - </b><i style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">What If? by Randall Munroe. </i><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);">I think this book counts as non-fiction? It's such a fun read for a science nerd like me. Read the whole thing in an afternoon. 4 stars.</span><br />
<i><br /></i>Linking up with <a href="http://www.lifeaccordingtosteph.com/" target="_blank">Steph</a> and <a href="http://www.janasays.com/" target="_blank">Jana</a> for their Show Us Your Books monthly linkup!Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-73807343860523206012015-02-24T10:49:00.000-05:002015-02-24T10:49:20.314-05:00life latelySigh. I really did mean it when I said I was going to post more. I'll get back into it-- I promise! Since it's been awhile since I've done a substantive post, I figured I'd do a "life lately" sort of post in bullet form. Baby steps, people :)<br />
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<li>The <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2015/01/whole-foods-plant-based.html" target="_blank">veganism</a> thing has sort of died for the time being. I'm not even that sorry, because I have a good reason. It's because...</li>
<li><b><u>I'm pregnant!</u></b> FINALLY! Today marks 9 weeks-- I have my first ultrasound on Thursday and I'm so excited about it.</li>
<li>Pregnancy is not being kind to me. I have all the sick. Which is why I'm eating whatever I can eat right now (which is hardly anything). No shame.</li>
<li>I've also been missing a lot of work... oops?<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<li>C has been an absolute gem through all of this. Seriously, he wins like Husband of the Year or something. I feel bad for him a lot (which leads to a lot of crazy-pregnant-lady tears).</li>
<li>We had to cancel our trip to Mexico. Yes, we were supposed to be in Mexico while it was like negative eleventy billion degrees here. That would have been lovely. You know, except for the fact that I would have had to stay in the hotel room the entire time puking.</li>
<li>Things I've learned thus far:</li>
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<li>The reason you salivate so much right before you vomit is to protect your teeth from the stomach acid.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<li>Apparently this little parasite isn't officially a fetus until 9 weeks. I have a fetus now! Also, C does NOT like it when I call the baby a parasite. (the truth hurts)</li>
<li>It is possible to have severe morning sickness without having <a href="http://www.helpher.org/" target="_blank">HG</a>. For some reason I was living in this fantasy world where it was like a binary propostition-- either not-that-bad or total-HG. Not so.</li>
<li>Related: anti-emetics are no magic bullet.</li>
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We're SO excited that Baby B is finally on his/her way, and I, for one, will be even more excited when the first trimester is over! Hopefully the puking will stop at that point!!! Lots more updates to come-- this little guy (or girl) is going to change a lot of things around here.</div>
Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-20250196572217762442015-01-29T07:14:00.001-05:002015-01-29T07:14:14.543-05:00loan progress -- 01.29.15<b><span style="color: red;">Undergrad: $0<br />Law School: $21,036.04</span></b><br />
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Remember a couple of weeks ago when I said I was going to post more? Clearly I suck at that. Sorry guys! The good news is that last week I paid off another loan! We're down to three, and that makes me really excited. These last three are scheduled to be paid off in May, September, and December, and I cannot explain to you how happy that makes me. By the end of 2015, I will no longer have ANY student loans. The words... I have none.<br />
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<br />Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-28946266961061639482015-01-20T07:29:00.003-05:002015-01-20T07:29:50.945-05:00my tax dollars at workI actually wasn't planning on writing a blog post today, but I saw this article and it about made me sick. I don't really have any words except to say that I'm really glad that I've significantly cut down the amount of meat in my diet... doing the only thing I can do-- speak with my dollars.<br />
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<a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/20/dining/animal-welfare-at-risk-in-experiments-for-meat-industry.html" target="_blank">U.S. Research Lab Lets Livestock Suffer in Quest for Profit</a><br />
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What do you think about this? Am I the only one surprised/shocked/dismayed/grossed out?Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-58119099783954091752015-01-07T12:14:00.003-05:002015-01-07T12:18:46.223-05:00things not to say to someone who's TTC<i>Sorry in advance for the rant. Just my mood for today. And because The West Wing has the answers for everything, that's what's happening here.</i><br />
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Some people might be surprised that #1 on the list isn't "I'm pregnant." Believe it or not, most people who are having trouble conceiving are not bitter old women who hate every pregnant woman and her joy. (Although I certainly have those days) Sometimes though... you just want to kill people. <br />
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<li>That you (or your wife/girlfriend/special lady) are pregnant accidentally.<br /><i>Although it may be true, just let me cling to my hope that you were trying as hard as I am. I don't need any reminders of how easy it is for everyone else to get pregnant.</i></li>
<li>That you hate being pregnant<br /><i>Seriously. Just think about what you say before it comes out of your mouth.</i></li>
<li>"Just relax" or "Just stop trying" or some variation of the same<br /><i>Ummm... yeah. That's not really how it works. It's like trying to ignore that leaky faucet once you've heard the drip.</i></li>
<li>"Maybe it's not meant to be"<br /><i>Just hurtful. Like you don't think I'd be a good parent or something.</i></li>
<li>"Just think of all the good things you have in your life"<br /><i>I'm not suicidal, just frustrated. And yes, I know that life will go on even if I never have a baby. I love my life. That doesn't mean that I don't want to have children TOO.</i></li>
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Really, I'm not bitter. I'm really, really not. Just sometimes I need to get these things out :)</div>
Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-12016126664370353872015-01-05T10:47:00.001-05:002015-01-05T10:47:29.840-05:00a clarificationBecause I've been asked by some, I'm going to provide a bit more clarity on what I mean when I say that C and I are <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2015/01/whole-foods-plant-based.html" target="_blank">adopting a vegan diet</a>. Because anyone who knows us knows that no one eats more meat and cheese than we do.<br />
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<a name='more'></a>I was talking to Kristen about it, and I think the term I'm going with is "veganish," although I think the proper term is <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2013/04/24/dining/healthy-meet-delicious.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0" target="_blank">flexitarian</a>. It's important to remember that I'm doing this for health reasons-- I don't have ethical issues with eating animal products (as long as I don't think too hard about factory farming). I love things like true macaroni and cheese (even better when you put a little half-and-half in it) and chicken fajitas with queso. I also love a good cheeseburger every once in awhile. The goal here really is to switch the proportions-- eat just a LITTLE bit of meat and cheese and lots of veggies and legumes, instead of LOTS of meat and cheese and just a little bit of veggies (if any at all).<br />
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I'm thinking our target diet will/should look something like this:<br />
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Last night I made a <u>really</u> delicious (vegan) tomato bisque, and tonight I'm going to stop by Jimmy John's on my way home from acupuncture. I have stuff to cook entirely vegan dinners for the rest of the week, and then we're going to go out for Mexican food on Friday. We may eventually get to the point where meat and cheese no longer taste good to us, but I think that quitting meat and cheese cold turkey (no pun intended) is a good way to set us up for failure.<br />
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Have any of you tried to do something like this? I appreciate any and all feedback/tips/advice!!Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-46815886114549395332015-01-04T08:00:00.000-05:002015-01-04T08:00:00.707-05:00not sacrificingThe thought of never making a roux-cheese sauce again is enough to make me want to cry, so I wanted to make a list of ways in which our new vegan-vegetarian lifestyle is NOT a sacrifice. Here goes-- feel free to add any of your thoughts in the comments!<br />
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<li>Raw meat is fucking nasty. Never touching it again would NOT be a problem.</li>
<li>I don't even <u>like</u> a lot of meat (steaks, pork, any game, roasts... pretty much all I like are sausage/bacon, hamburger, and chicken breasts)</li>
<li>I don't drink milk by itself. And there are plenty of milk substitutes to use for cooking.</li>
<li>I'm allergic to eggs, so I won't miss those at breakfast time. (although I'm still gonna have a cupcake every once in awhile. yum.)</li>
<li>Yogurt, mayo, and sour cream all gross me out, so I won't miss those either!</li>
<li>I'm not really a sweets person, so no ice cream or milk chocolate won't be that much of a problem.</li>
<li>I actually really like most fruit.</li>
<li>I also actually like cauliflower and broccoli. And that's a start.</li>
<li>Plenty of foods I eat are already vegan, like pasta and Cheerios, so that's not a change.</li>
<li>Meat and cheese are expensive.</li>
<li>No one hates losing weight.</li>
<li>Losing weight and getting healthier likely means that I'll get pregnant-- hooray!</li>
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Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-88388335425364638102015-01-02T08:00:00.000-05:002015-01-05T10:49:07.794-05:00whole-foods, plant-basedAs I alluded to <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2014/12/books-books.html" target="_blank">the other day</a>, C and I are in the process of adopting a "whole-foods, plant-based diet"-- <a href="http://www.forksoverknives.com/" target="_blank">Forks Over Knives</a>'s way of saying vegan. I know, I know. Veganism sounds a bit... out there? Extreme? What-the-hell-are-you-thinking? I'm not going to go into all the ways that animal products whack with your body. For that I recommend watching Forks Over Knives or reading <a href="http://thekindlife.com/" target="_blank">The Kind Diet</a>. I'm going to try to document this change-- the good, the bad, and the ugly. It's going to be a HUGE lifestyle change for me and C, so it's not going to come without its bumps.<br />
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A million years ago, when C and I were still dating (but living together), I read The Kind Diet, and it really kicked my ass. I was ready to go vegan then and there. I went out and bought things like almond milk, egg replacer, and vegan cheese. Alas, it lasted about 5 minutes. I'm not sure I even actually ate any of the vegan food that I bought. The problem was that C was not on board. Like, not even a little. And because I <u>love</u> meat and cheese, I couldn't handle watching him eat it. I also wasn't about to cook 2 dinners. Ain't nobody got time for that. So it died. I ignored all the information I had about factory farming, antibiotics, and what happens to your body when you ingest animal products.<br />
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Fast forward to now. C has started going to my primary care doctor (who I absolutely love), and after his initial appointment, she called him back in to have a come-to-jesus meeting with him about his cholesterol. He's always had high cholesterol (so did I, until I had my gall bladder removed), and we were both just like "Give him the statin already." Instead, she called him in and asked him about his diet. He told her honestly that mostly what we eat is various forms of meat, cheese, and pasta. If she was horrified (I bet she was), she hid it well. She told him, though, that she had some homework for him. She wanted him to watch Forks Over Knives and try going meat-free one day a week. When he came home from that appointment, he was all like "I bet she's like totally vegetarian. I mean, maybe we could cool it on the heavy sauces, but whatever."<br />
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I made sure that he did his homework though. In fact, we watched the documentary together, and I honestly think that he was blown away. As someone who grew up on a cattle/sheep farm, the thought of slaughtering and consuming meat does not gross him out at all. He really had no idea what effects eating animal products have on the body, though. By the end of the documentary, he was telling me to find some recipes.<br />
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So I mobilized! I am in no better form than when I am mobilized on a project. I went and got a bunch of books from the library and started making some new recipes. Nothing has been knock-out-of-the-park delicious yet, but nothing has been terrible either. I'm seriously stretching my comfort zone here-- picky eater alert! Here are some new foods I've tried in the last week:<br />
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<ul>
<li>avocado</li>
<li>chickpeas</li>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000WLCHDA/" target="_blank">nutritional yeast</a> (whew that stuff has a kick to it!)</li>
<li><a href="http://www.hodgsonmillstore.com/en/gluten-free/flax-chia-blend-12-oz--71518-01010-001_group" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">flax/chia powder</a></li>
<li>smoothies with spinach (what?!)</li>
</ul>
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Since making this choice, I've only had 3 meals (out of 19) that had meat in them. That's pretty good! I also, for the first time in my life, I think, did not buy any cheese at my grocery trip last Saturday. WOAH.</div>
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We also took the plunge and bought a <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B008TVES00" target="_blank">Blendtec</a>. So far I'm nothing short of amazed. It's also fantastic that it's self-cleaning. Our old blender (a Hamilton Beach) does not even compare. I made "alfredo" sauce with cauliflower the other night, which is something I do regularly. This sauce was so smooth and creamy, you would have no idea that there was cauliflower in it. Normally it's grainy. Edible, but grainy. I absolutely recommend it. And the recipe book that comes with it is awesome!</div>
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There are going to be days soon where I hate this. I hate the substituting and the cooking and the weird ingredients. There are going to be days when we go to our favorite Mexican restaurant and I order chicken fajitas with queso. But I think that as long as we do the plant-based thing <a href="http://www.seriouseats.com/2012/01/the-vegan-experience-days-14-15-and-16-the-wi.html" target="_blank">most of the time</a>, it'll be a victory. </div>
Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-6659454616429729912014-12-31T09:03:00.003-05:002014-12-31T09:03:29.581-05:00books! books!I'm back, bitches! :) Seriously though, I'm really going to try to actually be back. I've fallen in the trap of just opening Bloglovin and reading through everyone's blogs and then being done. It was better when I had all of my blogs in my Blogger homepage (except it sucked at updating so I missed a lot).<br />
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Anywho, I figured I'd wade slowly into this and start with a book challenge! I've been wanting to do one, and since I've actually been reading more lately, I figured this was a good time to start! I'm participating in <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/BookChallengeByErin/431300083688918/?notif_t=group_activity" target="_blank">this one</a> with help from <a href="http://www.seeyouinaporridge.com/" target="_blank">Kristen</a>, since I don't have facebook and I'm not going to start now. (Side note: this girl's a blogger! why didn't she post it on her blog? stupid facebook.)<br />
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So here's the challenge for Jan 1 through April 30:<br />
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<b>5 points: Read a book, any book that is at least 200 pages long. - </b><i>The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. Sometimes I like to read nerdy nonfiction :) This one has 371 pages.</i><br />
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<b>10 points: Read a book that begins with the “A”, “An”, or “The”. -</b> <i>The First True Lie by Marina Mander. I hope it's as good as I think it's going to be.</i><br />
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<b>10 points: Read a book with a two word title. -</b> <i>On Immunity by Eula Biss. It's a book about vaccines and fearmongering.</i><br />
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<b>15 points: Read a book with an animal in the title. -</b> <i>Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer. I've read it before (1 re-read is allowed), but it's been a long time. And reading it again right now will do me some good, as C and I are trying to transition to a plant-based diet.</i><br />
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<b>20 points: Take the first letter of your first name…Read a book that the title begins with that letter. -</b> <i>Main Street Vegan by Victoria Moran. Again with the plant-based eating... I'll write a post on that soonish.</i><br />
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<b>20 points: Read a book set in any country in Europe. -</b> <i>The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared by Jonas Jonasson. His second book is on NPR's list (see below), but this one sounded funnier. And it takes place in Sweden.</i><br />
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<b>25 points: Read a book from the NPR’s guide of great books from 2014. -</b> <i>Whew, there are a lot to choose from here. I think I'm going with Everything I never Told You by Celeste Ng. I actually really want to read To Rise Again at a Decent Hour by Joshua Ferris and The Fever by Megan Abbott too... Perhaps I will ;) There are also some super-cute kids books on there, but I figured that would be cheating.</i><br />
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<b>30 points: Read a book by a favourite author that is not a re-read. -</b> <i>All Fall Down by Jennifer Weiner. Don't judge me for loving chick lit.</i><br />
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<b>30 points: Read a book by a comedian or comedic actor. - </b><i>Bossypants by Tina Fey. Can you believe I still haven't read this book, despite the fact that Tina Fey is my biggest girl-crush ever?! Me either. I'm remedying that.</i><br />
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<b>35 points: Read a book about science, discovery, or a scientific process – non-fiction only. - </b><i>Genes, Chromosomes, and Disease by Nicholas Wright Gillham. I've had this book on my Kindle for a million years and have never gotten around to reading it.</i><br />
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On a related note, has anyone tried <a href="https://www.oysterbooks.com/" target="_blank">Oyster</a>? I'm intrigued, but I really want to know (from someone who's not writing a sponsored blog post) whether it's worth the money!Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-34710030359511846252014-11-13T08:54:00.002-05:002014-11-13T13:29:51.586-05:00random shit from a depression-addled mindHi everybody. I'm still here (barely). I've pretty much spiraled down into the depths of a depression that I haven't seen in <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-one-about-depression.html" target="_blank">5 years</a>. And let me tell you, boy howdy is it fun. Yes, I'm seeing a therapist again, and yes, I'm talking to my doctor about going back on my meds again (since clearly this whole <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2014/10/a-tale-of-love-and-loss.html" target="_blank">tapering</a> idea was a horrible one), but in the meantime, you get this me. I'm charming. You're welcome.<br />
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I'm still struggling to explain to C that anxiety isn't nervousness and <a href="http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2013/05/depression-part-two.html" target="_blank">depression isn't sadness</a>. Seriously, I can't seem to do it for the life of me.<br />
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I'm starting to wonder if, by trying to get pregnant, I'm attempting to thwart natural selection. If back before actual doctors and medicine, someone like me would have killed themselves or starved to death (due to lack of giving a shit about finding food or eating) prior to the chance to procreate. If I'm saddling my future child(ren) with a lifetime of possessing a brain that doesn't work. [P.S.- If you're feeling an overwhelming urge to tell me in the comments that I'm being silly about this, I'm gonna stop you right there. C already tried it, and I almost punched him in the face for being dismissive.]<br />
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On that same note, perhaps that's why I haven't gotten pregnant yet. My body's like "No <u>way</u>, crazy lady. No progeny for you."<br />
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Getting out of bed and going to work every morning is probably the hardest thing I do. I hate my job, I hate getting dressed, I hate the cold, I <u>HATE</u> talking/interacting with people, and I hate having to put on my "normal person" façade.<br />
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Speaking of, I seriously <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2014/08/dreams-are-for-young.html" target="_blank">need to find a new job</a>, and I don't think this is just the depression talking. I'm finding myself actually missing my old job (not the last one, but the one before that), which is disturbing to me on a lot of levels.<br />
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Everyone is raving about <a href="http://serialpodcast.org/" target="_blank">Serial</a> and how great it is. I really want to listen to it, but question the wisdom of that in my current mental state. I'll probably turn into a horribly paranoid person, convinced that, at any moment, someone I know will hack me up into bits. (I have no idea if that's what happens or not. I obviously haven't listened to any of it.)<br />
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Just trying to remember that <a href="http://thebloggess.com/2012/04/depression-lies/" target="_blank">depression lies</a> and keep on going. Focus on the memory of normalcy, because I still can remember what it was like (barely). One foot in front of the other. I can do this.Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-83759930213501489192014-10-29T08:17:00.001-04:002014-10-29T08:17:35.221-04:00loan progress -- 10.29.14<b><span style="color: red;">Undergrad: $0<br />Law School: $26,479.40</span></b><br />
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Another loan is gone! This is the point in the debt snowball where I <u>really</u> feel like I'm getting somewhere. With each loan that gets paid off, my direct debit payment gets lower. That means that I can make a bigger payment toward whichever loan I'm paying off at the moment. And <u>that</u> means that each loan goes away faster than the loan before. Thanks Dave Ramsey (even though I think half the shit you say is crazy)!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj74waAEArMWH508lGbXJZHxiLoefowgakJMW9WhGIKqr-CRthCcAVb8D-ckj5JT7IuIVCycOePzJtwRiTVTzxyDgMv4PM3awp4WHbDmx_y55cmehjLN09IJbnL0OkMXcWnHJ9jlZdwRzds/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-10-29+at+8.13.30+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj74waAEArMWH508lGbXJZHxiLoefowgakJMW9WhGIKqr-CRthCcAVb8D-ckj5JT7IuIVCycOePzJtwRiTVTzxyDgMv4PM3awp4WHbDmx_y55cmehjLN09IJbnL0OkMXcWnHJ9jlZdwRzds/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-10-29+at+8.13.30+AM.png" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">That one on the top is the one in my crosshairs now</td></tr>
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I've still got about a year left to go until the whole thing is paid off (estimated date 1/1/16), but I still feel awesome. Obviously with each payment I have less to go, but getting below $30k is a real mental boost to me. I can only imagine how I'll feel when that balance goes down to 4 digits...Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-75251503318009738662014-10-16T10:32:00.000-04:002014-10-16T10:32:41.821-04:00tabless thursdayI admit that I'm REALLY bad about staying focused. On more than one <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2013/07/video-killed-radio-star.html" target="_blank">occasion</a> I have blamed this on technology (believe it or not, I was better focused as a child!), and when I saw this video I knew I had to share it. Enjoy, and perhaps try your own #TablessThursday!<br />
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<object classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=9,0,47,0" height="349" id="flashObj" width="620"><param name="movie" value="http://c.brightcove.com/services/viewer/federated_f9?isVid=1&isUI=1" /><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF" /><param name="flashVars" value="videoId=3631149259001&linkBaseURL=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.theatlantic.com%2Fvideo%2Fiframe%2F373027%2F&playerID=1065729157001&playerKey=AQ~~,AAAABvb_NGE~,DMkZt2E6wO3dFlbHM7HTX1y1bVRDHLp_&domain=embed&dynamicStreaming=true" /><param name="base" value="http://admin.brightcove.com" /><param name="seamlesstabbing" value="false" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="swLiveConnect" value="true" /><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always" /><embed src="http://c.brightcove.com/services/viewer/federated_f9?isVid=1&isUI=1" bgcolor="#FFFFFF" flashVars="videoId=3631149259001&linkBaseURL=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.theatlantic.com%2Fvideo%2Fiframe%2F373027%2F&playerID=1065729157001&playerKey=AQ~~,AAAABvb_NGE~,DMkZt2E6wO3dFlbHM7HTX1y1bVRDHLp_&domain=embed&dynamicStreaming=true" base="http://admin.brightcove.com" name="flashObj" width="620" height="349" seamlesstabbing="false" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowFullScreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" swLiveConnect="true" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/shockwave/download/index.cgi?P1_Prod_Version=ShockwaveFlash"></embed></object>Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-21516367912933954632014-10-08T15:10:00.002-04:002014-10-08T15:10:51.133-04:00random confessionsI haven't linked up with <a href="http://www.lifeinprogress.ca/" target="_blank">Kathy</a> in awhile, so get ready for some random fun!!<br />
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<li>This morning I went to the bathroom shortly after I got to work. While there, I realized that Grover had eaten a hole in the crotch of my underwear at some point, and I had put them on this morning without noticing that fact. Oops.</li>
<li>I actually thought to myself today, "I wonder if I could hire a maid to deep clean the house and pass it off as C's birthday present." Wife of the year right here, my friends. Wife. Of. The. Year.</li>
<li>Related note-- I'm not sure when the last time I cleaned the house was. Pretty sure the last time I cleaned the floors was documented for posterity on <a href="http://www.instagram.com/marcie_pants" target="_blank">Instagram</a>, so feel free to look through the archives and give me the side eye re: how long it's been.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://lovemyblack.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Michelle-Obama-Side-Eye-5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://lovemyblack.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Michelle-Obama-Side-Eye-5.jpg" height="320" width="310" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://lovemyblack.com/michelle-obama-side-eyes-john-boehner/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">source</a></td></tr>
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<li>I have a "black tie optional" event to go to on Friday night, and I still have nothing to wear. I should be more concerned about it than I am.</li>
<li>I've started just buying maternity clothes. Given that I carry all my weight in my stomach anyway, and I was really tired of waiting to buy new clothes until I got pregnant, I just said fuck it. (And apparently I'm <a href="http://www.scmp.com/lifestyle/family-education/article/1450830/expectant-mums-arent-only-ones-buying-modern-maternity" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">not the only one</a>) I'm wearing <a href="http://www.target.com/p/maternity-3-4-sleeve-knit-dress-liz-lange-for-target/-/A-15528149" target="_blank">this dress</a> today, and it's probably the most comfortable (and cute!) thing I own. Within the past 6 months or so, I've really started loving my body for the way it is, instead of spending all my time wishing I could lose 30 (or 50) pounds. So I'm rocking the maternity clothes. #dontcare</li>
<li>Work has made me ragey lately. I really should Zen out about it more, because it's just work and whatever, but lord have mercy bitches be crazy.</li>
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That's enough random shit for one day, y'all. Trying to get back into this blogging thing one post at a time! :)</div>
Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-34667727581748120022014-10-07T12:02:00.000-04:002014-10-07T13:15:20.814-04:00choose your own adventure -- month 2: food (and a month 1 recap)You know what? I didn't do as badly as I had anticipated I would last month. While it was not an overwhelming success, it wasn't a total failure either.<br />
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<a href="http://www.notentirelyperfect.com/" title="Not Entirely Perfect"><img alt="Not Entirely Perfect" src="http://i979.photobucket.com/albums/ae274/venustrappedinmars/GoalSettingLinkup.png" style="border: none;" /></a><br />
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Here are my goals and how I did:<br />
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<li><i><u><b>Do and review a bunch of prenatal workout DVDs</b></u></i>-- ummm.... not great. But not bad either! I did 2 out of the 6, and one of them I did a few times! I count that as a success, especially since I was on an all-things-pregnancy hiatus for the last week of the month (<a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2014/10/a-tale-of-love-and-loss.html" target="_blank">for obvious reasons</a>). I'm going to keep going too; I'll write that review post if it kills me!</li>
<li><i><u><b>Budget and/or save money for the MuTu System</b></u></i>-- good! <a href="http://www.beautyschooldropout.net/" target="_blank">Sarah</a> (being the awesome person that she is) told me that MuTu will do sales sometimes, and so not to pay full price. I took her advice, and signed up for their mailing list. Lo and behold, a week later I got an email with a code for 15% off! Victory! I think I'll buy it for myself in November.</li>
<li><u style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Bonus Points</u>-- I signed up for a yoga class at work. It meets every Tuesday during lunchtime, and I've gone every week thus far! It helps that it's only one floor up from me, and F-R-E-E is always a good price. I really like it though! </li>
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October's challenge is food. Once again, I'm keeping it simple but meaningful with my goals. This month I only have one goal, but it's going to be a lot of work:</div>
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<ol>
<li><b><u><i>Input all of my random-ass, floating-around recipes into my HotPot app, and edit the ones that are already in there to mirror the way I actually make them</i></u></b>-- I love my <a href="http://www.hotpot-app.com/" target="_blank">HotPot app</a>. It's one of the very few apps that I've actually paid for, and I'm not sorry about it. It manages all of my recipes (in theory) in one place, helps me meal plan, makes me a shopping list, and I can prop my iPad up on the counter to use as a recipe card without worrying about getting marinara splashes all over the cards (oops). It's <a href="http://www.hotpot-app.com/index.php/hotpot-automatic-recipe-extraction" target="_blank">really easy</a> to input recipes from websites into the app, and I've done that. But I still have a lot of recipes that I've gotten from my mom or from friends that I just have in a regular recipe book. Those I'll have to input by hand. I've wanted/needed to do this for awhile, but lord is it going to be a PITA. I think if I can get this done this month, it will be a <u>major</u> victory for my life.</li>
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Fingers crossed!</div>
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Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-82695241861213646262014-10-02T11:15:00.000-04:002014-10-02T11:15:08.184-04:00a tale of love and loss<i>*Warning: This post is a real downer (if you couldn't tell by the title). If you're not in the mood for a downer, close the window right now. This is your last chance to get out.*</i><br />
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<a name='more'></a>So I've been absent for awhile. What's up, guys? Still trying to find my voice now that I'm actually trying to have a baby instead of waiting to try to have a baby. I'm not sure that I want my blog to turn into a mommy blog, but it's hard because I'm eat-sleep-breathing TTC right now. So I feel like there's nothing else that I have to talk about. So I haven't been talking at all.<br />
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I'm talking today, though. I'm talking because I need to use my words and this blog is my outlet for that. So I apologize in advance for the word-vomit.<br />
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Last week I was pregnant, and this week I am not. Of all the scenarios that I imagined in my head, this one never came up. When I first realized that I would find out whether or not I was pregnant around the time of my birthday, it was a binary result: either I would have gotten pregnant this cycle and it would be a VERY happy birthday, or I would have not gotten pregnant this cycle and it would be momentarily sad but I would move on with my life. Instead, inexplicably, I got neither. And both. All at the same time.<br />
<br />
On the afternoon of Wednesday, September 25, I discovered that I was pregnant. This did not come as a shock to me, as I had been <u>certain</u> that I was pregnant since the day after I ovulated. It was a very exciting day though. C was on his way home from a work trip, so I spent the intervening couple of hours writing a <a href="https://img1.etsystatic.com/033/0/5597772/il_570xN.580985697_dg1c.jpg" target="_blank">funny card</a> to tell him and writing a postcard to the baby. I had bought a package of 10 postcards with plans to write one to the baby every 4 weeks, and then frame them in the gallery wall. So I wrote a message on the postcard and hung it up on the wall. C came home, saw the card, and it was a very happy night. I told my sister via FaceTime, and the three of us were very much looking forward to that second pink line getting darker and darker.<br />
<br />
Well, that didn't really happen. The next morning, the line was lighter. On Friday morning, the line was lighter still-- barely there. By Saturday, the line was gone. I vacillated all weekend between depression and denial. I kept taking tests, willing the second line to come back. Perhaps those negative tests were faulty. Maybe it was <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vanishing_twin" target="_blank">vanishing twin</a>. On Monday, I called my OB/GYN's office to see what I should do. Although I called at 8, I didn't receive a call back until after 2. They told me to come in for a blood test. A blood test would give us all the answers. Not 20 minutes after I hung up the phone, I went to the bathroom to find that the blood had started. That was it; I was losing my baby. And there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.<br />
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I never envisioned this scenario, so it all really caught me off guard. I had never thought about how I would feel if I had a miscarriage. Miscarriages happen to other people, not me. Yet here I was, mere hours before my 29th birthday, doubled over in both emotional and physical pain.<br />
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I'm still struggling with how I'm "supposed" to feel about all of this. A wise man once said "<a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2014/01/comparison-is-thief-of-joy.html" target="_blank">comparison is the thief of joy</a>." Comparison can also be the thief of sorrow too. It's good to have perspective, to know that your bad hair day or trip up (or down) the stairs isn't the worst thing that could happen to you. But it can also be bad, when you tell yourself that you're not allowed to feel sad/angry/frustrated about something that happened to you just because it wasn't the WORST POSSIBLE THING that has ever happened to anyone. Like, I shouldn't be sad because I only knew that I was pregnant for a few days. Women who are much farther along than I was lose babies all the time. <a href="http://www.pregnantchicken.com/pregnant-chicken-blog/2014/4/5/scary-shit-series-stillbirth" target="_blank">Stillbirths</a> still exist. Kids get cancer and people still die of horrible diseases. But saying that just because what I went/am going through isn't as bad as all of those horrible things doesn't mean that <a href="http://www.scarymommy.com/coping-with-a-miscarriage/" target="_blank">I get to be sad</a> is disingenuous and mean. I very much wanted that baby, and I am sad that he/she is gone.<br />
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So yesterday was a rough birthday. The worst one yet, in fact. I'm trying to not let the voice that says "fuck it. I don't want to do this anymore." win, because I know that's just <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-one-about-depression.html" target="_blank">the depression</a> talking. (p.s.- AWESOME timing to taper off my meds) It sucks though, because I really don't think I'll be able to experience the instant joy of seeing that second line ever again. I think it'll always be like, "Yeah, well, we'll see about that." I'm sad about losing that too, about losing my innocence.<br />
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I'm slowly wading through this, and it will probably take me a little bit to get back to normal, but I'm going to try to blog more in the meantime. I started this blog for me, and while I enjoy that people read and are interested in what I have to say, I can't let it stop being for me. If I start writing too much about TTC and I lose readers, so be it. (Sorry guys, love you!) So we'll see what the next few weeks and months bring. Until then, thanks for sticking around through my recent hiatus.Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-72355766196117424602014-09-04T08:45:00.001-04:002014-09-04T08:45:38.481-04:00why i do itWhen people find out about my crazy student loan repayment schedule, their first question is "How?" (the answer to that can be found <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2013/07/how-i-do-it.html" target="_blank">here</a>) The unspoken question, the one I can see in their eyes, is "Why?" Why would I take on this accelerated repayment plan when I could just apply for <a href="https://studentaid.ed.gov/repay-loans/forgiveness-cancellation/charts/public-service" target="_blank">loan forgiveness</a> (this is possible since I work for a public institution)? There are a few reasons.<br />
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<li><b><u>Because I can.</u></b> Probably the easiest and most straightforward reason. C and I have the means to do this. If we didn't, we wouldn't be. We would be paying the minimum, because the minimum is all you have to pay in order to not get yourself in trouble, or some amount in between the minimum and my-entire-paycheck.</li>
<li><b><u>Because I don't trust the government.</u></b> We've already established that <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2013/11/a-libertarians-view-on-holidays.html" target="_blank">I'm a libertarian</a>, but this goes beyond that. In order to take advantage of the PSLF program, you have to make 120 on-time payments. For those of you bad at math, that's 10 years worth of monthly payments. Since I don't have to (see above), I'm not going to put all of my faith in a government program and hope that it doesn't get de-funded before 10 years from now. Just the thought of racking up ALL of that money in interest in hopes that it would be forgiven, and then having the rug pulled out from under me, is enough to make me want to vomit. Plus, that also ties me down to one (type of) employer for 10 years, which gives me anxiety. Don't fence me in!</li>
<li><b><u>Because it makes me feel good about myself.</u></b> I feel <u>proud</u> every time I make a payment! When I see my balance going down, it makes me smile. And when I think about how C and I will only have our mortgage after these are paid off, that makes me even happier.</li>
<li><b><u>Because these interest rates are no joke.</u></b> Currently my student loan interest rate is at 6.55% (and that's with a 0.25% rate reduction because I'm enrolled in auto-pay), which is higher than our mortgage rate and our auto loan rate COMBINED. <br />Still, though, 6.55% isn't that high, right? I present to you Exhibit A: My payment history for the last 12 payments. As you can see, this goes back to mid-May (the last payment I would have made before this list starts is 5/17), which is less than 4 months ago. In the span of 3.5 months, I paid almost $570 in interest alone. HOLY CRAP that's alotta money! And I'm paying WAY more than I'm scheduled to. I'd hate to think what that number would be if I were only paying the minimum balance every month. And it just goes to show you that paying even a little extra each month means less money going down the drain to interest!</li>
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So that's it. I'm sure to some people it still seems crazy, but to me it's totally worth all the struggle and sacrifice. (Plus all the kudos from you guys doesn't hurt either!)</div>
Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-86766694242839326382014-09-03T14:22:00.003-04:002014-09-03T14:22:36.046-04:00choose your own adventure -- month 1: fitnessUgh. OF COURSE the first month of this link-up that I so badly want to participate in is about fitness. Since clearly I'm a total narcissist (aren't all bloggers?), my first instinct is to say "STOP JUDGING MY SLOTH, OTHER BLOGGERS!!" But then I get over myself and realize that their judginess is well-founded. [Except, obviously, they're not actually judging me. Because they don't really care about my laziness. Ha!]<br />
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<a href="http://www.notentirelyperfect.com/" title="Not Entirely Perfect"><img alt="Not Entirely Perfect" src="http://i979.photobucket.com/albums/ae274/venustrappedinmars/GoalSettingLinkup.png" style="border: none;" /></a></div>
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<a name='more'></a>Since <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2014/04/epiphany.html" target="_blank">quitting running</a>, I've been doing a whole lot of not exercising. Oops. I completely fell off the <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2013/08/accountability.html" target="_blank">get-healthy-for-baby wagon</a>, which probably isn't the best. I don't know why I've never been able to stick to an exercise routine, but in my nearly-30 years, I never have. I get a wild hair and start one, and I go on and on for awhile, and then something happens and I stop as abruptly as I started. And who knows, this may just be another blip on the exercise radar, but I'm really going to try this month. And if I don't end up posting at the end of the month (you know, like the <a href="http://mylifeontheneedles.blogspot.com/2014/05/4-weeks-fit-challenge-goal-time.html" target="_blank">last time</a> I did a fitness link-up), somebody call me on my lazy shenanigans, k?<br />
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Here are my fitness goals for the month of September. I'm really going to do them. Really really. Really.<br />
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<b><i><u>Do and review a bunch of prenatal workout DVDs.</u></i></b> Yeah, I know I said I'd do this last time. I'm really doing it this time. Like, hopefully soon I'll be pregnant and so there's a reasonable sense of urgency. These are the DVDs I'll be doing (hopefully. I am borrowing them from the library so there's no guarantee they'll be available for me before the end of the month), so check back later in the month for reviews:<br />
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<ol>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B000I2J6K0/" target="_blank">Prenatal Fitness Fix with Erin O'Brien</a> (I already got this one, so I'll start with it)</li>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B000YA4F2K/" target="_blank">Lindsay Brin's pre-pregnancy and first trimester custom exercise & yoga program</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00AQ4WJM2/" target="_blank">Tracy Anderson: The Pregnancy Project</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/B009AVCADK/" target="_blank">What to Expect When You're Expecting: The Workout</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Leisa-Hart-FitMama-Prenatal-Workout/dp/B000W1V4OS/" target="_blank">Leisa Hart: Fitmama - Prenatal Workout</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Go-Mom-Fitness-Prenatal-Workout/dp/B004DF3S4I/" target="_blank">Prenatal Fitness for the Entire Body</a></li>
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<u style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Budget and/or save money for the MuTu System.</u> I've been wanting to do something like this for awhile. I first came across a program like this called <a href="http://www.mombodfitness.com/recore-program1.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">mombod fitness</a>, but I like the <a href="http://mutusystem.com/mutu-system-12-week-program.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">MuTu program</a> better because it's cheaper and more flexible (although I am still interested in the mombod <a href="http://www.mombodfitness.com/fitsplint-maternity.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">FitSplint</a> for when I do get pregnant). It's still not super cheap ($97), so I can't impulse-buy it, but I very much want to get it. I thank Sarah from <a href="http://www.beautyschooldropout.net/" target="_blank">Beauty School Dropout</a> for introducing it to me!<br />
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That's it! I'm not going overboard and setting myself up for failure (judging by how I did on my last fitness link-up, I may have already done that). Fingers crossed that I stop sucking!!!</div>
Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1841402070953783724.post-90362877819142475792014-09-01T14:55:00.000-04:002014-09-03T14:56:09.430-04:00loan progress -- 09.01.14<b><span style="color: red;">Undergrad: $0<br />Law School: $30,008.21</span></b><br />
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<u>So close</u> to busting through $30k! A couple more weeks and I'll be there with room to spare :)<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Have I mentioned lately how much I love seeing all those "Paid In Full"s?</td></tr>
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<br />Marciehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17866179035149777406noreply@blogger.com0