the definition of need

Remember when you were a kid and you would beseech your parents for something? "But mooooooom!!!!! I neeeeeeeeed it!!!!" and your mother would answer, "You don't NEED it. You just want it." Well, pregnancy brings with it a whole new definition of the word. I never fully understood it until I got pregnant myself, but it's true.

My first craving was for Pizza Hut's stuffed crust pizza (oh how I wish this post were sponsored). I saw a commercial for it during March Madness, and then it was all I could think about. I ordered it one day as I was leaving work. First of all, the new crust options? Paralyzed by choice. I finally went for the "Hut Favorite." Then came choosing the topping(s). Don't they know all I want is the freaking crust? I don't care what toppings are on this pizza! GIVE ME THE CRUST!!! But really, it was just as delicious as I thought it could be. I kept ordering it. More, more, MORE! Until one night, when tragedy struck.

Well, I suppose since I didn't know about it until the next morning, that's probably when the tragedy struck. I was making my breakfast, and when I went to throw something away, I saw it. A whole piece of stuffed crust laying on top of the garbage like it was, well, garbage. I. Was. Furious. I stomped out to the living room and gave C the what for. Then I walked back and picked it out of the garbage.

I stood there for a couple moments, weighing my options. The pull to eat this piece of crust that had been sitting in the garbage for 12 hours was disturbingly strong. I tried to rationalize by telling myself that there was nothing dirty in the garbage at the time (true), so it would be fine. I really did come thisclose to eating it. In the end, concern for the parasite won out, and I threw it back in the trash. Not gonna lie, I almost cried after I did that.

I've since moved on to Eggo waffles. The day that that started, I ate 8 waffles for dinner. And that's it. I also put hamburger and cheese on top of them. Damn was that good.

C sat across from me at the table (while eating a perfectly normal meal of chili) and said, "You're right, Marcie. You really haven't been having any cravings." #sideeye