the moment of truth

C is out of town for business for the next couple of days, so the puppy and I have the house to ourselves. What that used to mean for me was bingeing. I would make a pound of spaghetti and meat sauce and eat it all in one sitting. Make a meal for four and eat it all myself. Order a large pizza and inhale it without a second thought or a single piece leftover.

10.29.13 -- loan progress

Undergrad: $0
Law School: $45,401.58

10.28.13 -- weigh-in

AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's all I have to say about that.

Start (08.17.13): 199 lbs.
Week 1 (08.24.13): 196.5 lbs.
Week 2 (09.02.13): 198 lbs.
Week 3 (09.09.13): 198.5 lbs.
Week 4 (09.16.13): 195.5 lbs.
Week 5 (09.23.13): 195.5 lbs.
Week 6 (09.30.13): 196.5 lbs.
Week 7 (10.07.13): 193.5 lbs.
Week 8 (10.14.13): 192 lbs.
Week 9 (10.21.13): 192.5 lbs.
Week 10 (10.28.13): 193 lbs.

my very own nigerian prince

I got the most awesome email sent to my work account today.

perception

There is a psychiatric disorder known as Body Dysmorphic Disorder. It occurs when people see flaws that don't exist when they look at themselves in a mirror.

While it's not a psychiatric disorder, sometimes I feel like I suffer from anti-BDD. When I look in the mirror, I don't see myself as I actually look. Then when I look at pictures of myself, I am disgusted by myself in a visceral way that I can't quite describe. There is a phenomenon that explains why this reaction occurs for most people, but I don't think that's what's occurring with me.

little miss crankypants

C just got on the treadmill and ran farther and faster than I can, even after 3.5 weeks of c25k. No warm-up or anything; just got on the treadmill and ran a half mile. No big deal.

I know it's not a competition with anyone other than myself, but I can't help but feel discouraged. For a self-professed non-runner (thanks to his pigeon toes), C sure can run. Now I feel bad for feeling this way. Grr. 

if at first you don't succeed...

...rip it out until you get it right.